vandalswithjetpacks:

The idea that people had sex before the 20th century really freaks me out. Like George Washington probably got a blow job and that makes me uncomfortable.

waitinforthebus:

what a great nap, i feel totally disoriented and i’m frothing with hate 

therealhorusszahhak:

This guy at my school shows up every day with like a fake wolf tail clipped to his back belt loop, and I always see him running from class to class and jumping over things and he looks so happy to exist and sometimes he brings a lil wolf puppet with him and he makes it run along next to him on the strings
I’m just like u go wolf kid live ur dreams

relentlessly-chaotic:

how am i meant to control my life i can’t even control my hair

this is too accurate

hamfarto:

hamfarto:

im having one of those unattractive days

i mean years

people my age are getting pregnant and married and i can’t even order a pizza over the phone